Saturday, November 12, 2005

New Career Path

Well, last night was just about the funniest night ive had in a long time.. Let me explain why.. The evening started off in a predictable enough way, drinks in the Tuns in college, then on to a Wetherspoons to meet people from our Nationalism seminar. That was a laugh, and we managed to blend in topic converstations as varied as Prince Charles and organic farming, american foreign policy, and which one of our lecturers we'd "shag, marry or kill". We are the Creme de la creme, lets not forget. So then there was the mandatory 'tergiversation' about what our next move was going to be, and Dardan (Kosovar/an(?) guy from our class) suggested that we go to a club in South Ken, because he knew an albanian guy who was friends with the serbian owner of the club and so we could get in for free. So after much humming and hawing we democratically agreed to go and check this place out, even though the others felt it was a little off the beaten track. (Zone 2!! The horror of it!!) My lord.. we arrived at the club (Leeson St. basement type scenario, of this massive georgian type house) and there was of course a que of people, of the most fashionably type,(We're not talking the Palace here..), two people at the door with earpieces and clipboards, and of course the all imporant velvet rope that separates the world into the 'desirables' and 'non-desirables'. So of course Mary and me looked at each other, i looked down at my trainers, and we had a good ol laugh about the fact that we COULD NOT be more out of place, couldnt look any more wrongly dressed for the occasion, and there was no way we were gonna get into the 'Holy Realm of Trendyness'. So off Dardan goes and we follow him straight passed the que, all the while being glarred at by the queees, and he goes over and has a world with the albanian bouncer, who rings someone. We are beckoned so we follow and the FRONT DOOR is opened and we are let into the lare. We couldnt believe the hilariousness of the situation but Dardan looked unfased. So we walk in through the various rooms and the upstairs bit is LITERALLY full of old, rich and powerful men surrounded by beautiful young women and shockingly expensive bottles of champagne. A definate pimps and hos vibe! We walk on downstairs to the club bit and reach metrosexual heaven, sprinkled with a healthy serving of upperclass-english-slag-in-mini-skirt. My God, ive never wanted to cause physical harm to so many people in one room. The guys ALL had highlighted spikey hair, were drinking WINE and kept checking themselves out in the mirrors! So anyway, the highlight of the night was when Dardan's friends finally arrived. The thing is that this guy is actually the most famous rapper in Kosovo and hes actually a massive celebrity over there. So after a bit, he came back and was like 'i arranged a table for us', so of course we all followed. I'm telling you, i could get well used to that lifestyle, and im so gonna use my albanian mafia connection in London. I was infact langered by the end of the night because Mary's flatmate kept buying me drinks and well, it'd be rude not to. So thus ended a particularly crazy friday night in london town. I tell you, that Dardan is a dark horse! Big up the Kosovo London Connection!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

firstly, the wohle country attire screams duck à l'orange and bread puddig, dahling!!!! and secondly, i bow down to thee who joins the colalition to stop the phenomenon that is the english spikey blonde hair do!!! wen will it stop!!!! xxx

Anonymous said...

Maximum Tities, you mad thing! - Sounds like you were in a dodgy rap video on friday night... Amro needs help with the whole dressing up as a song title thing next saturday.. what are you going as? sorry but your two suggestions so far were pretty lame.. get your thinking cap on girl. Hope football in the park was fun. have a good week and be good. Tities xxx

Izzie said...

Petty Filloo is all I can say to that! Lucky you getting to see all the trendiness London Has to offer. At the moment a decent shower would be the height of luxury and chique I can experience. Can't wait to see you at Crimbo. So weird being so far away and in a hot country I forget that its christmas. Namaste xxx

Anonymous said...

Hey Kiddo! Dont forget to let me know wat you and amro are choosing to go as!!! I want to be able to enjoy the vision of people trying to dress up as song titles...you cud really go mad with that one.Im thinking:Im Just A Girl, Lay Lady Lay( an excuse to remain horizontal for the whole nite!!!),One angry dwarf and 200 solemn faces (ben Folds)..ajajajjajaajjajajaja...Have a good night!xx